When hospitality is not present 2

Nov 30, 2021 | Care Conversations

There are too many embarrassing and sad moments about my high school experience to even begin to catalogue. Every evening, alone in my bedroom I would have a sad and depressing pity party.

In those early teen years, I was actually quite fit. I played soccer, cricket and was a reasonable runner. I well remember in my second year taking part in athletic heats that would determine the athletics team that would compete against other local schools. The problem? The events would take place on Saturday. I knew that my parents could simply not afford the additional cost of transportation to get me to those events.

During the 200 metre heats, I found myself leading the pack; I knew that if I made first or second place, I would be expected to attend the competition the following Saturday. I had no option but to slow down and let others pass me. One of my few opportunities for success and I had to throw it away.

Why do I mention this? I subsequently became a teacher and at first my approach to teaching was based on what I had experienced. I was as inhospitable as the teachers and community I had experienced!

BUT, when Jesus Christ drew me to Himself and began to redeem my thinking, my approach to teaching was transformed. I began to develop a determination to seek out the lonely and the isolated; the sad and the troubled. There are school students across the world who are desperate for understanding and for our love and care. They need to love and be loved, know and be known, serve and be served and celebrate and be celebrated. This needs to take place in an environment that radiates hospitality.

We have many young people in need of our pro-active support and grace. I can look back at my school experiences years later and see that they have been redeemed by Jesus Christ; I can actually value them now. It was the Lord instilling in me a love for young people that maybe I could not have gained in any another way. I pray that each one of our students will leave our communities knowing that they have been loved and valued because we have reflected the nature of Christ to them.

Blessings
Brian

Care Conversations

Nov 30, 2021 | Care Conversations

It’s well over fifty years since the beginning of my own high school experience. I have to say that, at the time, I didn’t see it as pleasant!

My parents earnestly believed that a good education was essential for me. Like many parents of their generation, they had left school early and had no formal qualifications. They enrolled me into an examination at the age of eleven that, if successful, would send me to an elite Grammar School at no cost. I was successful and thus began seven years of horror! You have to understand that my family was extremely poor. My dad was a basic farm hand. Whilst we ate well with lots of farm produce, there was no spare cash for any of life’s extras.

So, on day one of school, I was the shy young boy wearing a second-hand uniform amongst the sons and daughters of doctors, lawyers and successful businesspeople in their brand-new clothes. I was an instant target for ridicule.

My journey to and from school was lengthy. It was good from the point of view that I lived so far from the school, that other students were never likely to visit and therefore I would be spared embarrassment concerning our modest home and depressed neighborhood.

The negative point was that I arrived three minutes before the staring bell and had to leave five minutes after the end of school in order to catch buses.

My day started at 6am and I reached home most days at 6.30pm. All of this meant that after school activities were simply not an option for me; a further isolating factor. The more horrifying memory though is that whilst I was never part of the students’ “in-crowd”, neither did any teacher take an interest in my life. We were addressed by our family name which hardly encouraged intimacy.

So, I lived a lonely, introverted life made worse by the fact that I could never speak with my parents about how sad, lonely and heartbreaking my school life was. They were sacrificing everything they had to give me a “good education” and I hated every moment and every day. On some occasions my life was so bone-numbingly miserable that I feigned illness rather than attend school.

More next week.

Blessings
Brian

Care Conversations

Nov 24, 2021 | Care Conversations

Hospitality

Time to consider another aspect of school community being like a family.

Good families exercise generous hospitality.

How do we, as teachers, welcome students into our classrooms? How do students ensure a welcoming environment for each other?

Do our students experience hospitality or hostility? The prefix “hos” means stranger. Being hospitable means welcoming a stranger – the stranger becomes a guest. Being hostile means being opposed to or rejecting a stranger; the stranger becomes an enemy.

Henri Nouwen’s book “Reaching Out” is based upon the Biblical Christian concept of hospitality. In one of the chapters, he addresses how hospitality should be something that exists between teachers and students.

When speaking of the relationship between teachers and students, Nouwen points out that the teacher is called upon to create a space, free of fear, where student and teacher can have a creative exchange of ideas, and where the students can grow and develop. He encourages the teacher to help students see that their own life experiences, their own insights, their own convictions are worthy.

Nouwen reminds us that hospitality is based upon acceptance, not hostility, especially the kinds of subtle hostility, which makes fun of newcomers or puts the newcomer into embarrassing situations. I am personally ashamed of my first couple of years of teaching. I practiced sarcasm as a means of control in my classrooms. I mistakenly thought that behaving in this way would elevate me above my students, that I would be seen as superior. I now sadly reflect upon the fact that I created hostility and insecurity, an unsafe environment for young and vulnerable people.

Thankfully the Lord can redeem our errors

Blessings
Brian

Reference:

1. Nouwen, H. (1986). Reaching Out. Image Books/Doubleday.